"Its There"

The words...

The weight...

Of sentences gone unspoken

Now are the chains that bind you

And the confinement that you live within

Struggles of emotions and feelings

Its there...

Ever present

An unpleasant daily reminder

Of a battle that wages between thoughts

The path the heart and soul wish to lead

And the vision from what the world sees

Its there...

Confusion causes moments of darkness

A heavy embrace you wish not to bare

Especially when all that you want to do is live within the light

Even though bravery can be seen

Its existence is just beyond the horizon

Its there...

Awaiting your eager reach

Like a new dawn of a new day

It carries the sharp and exhilarating feeling of crisp air drawn in

Its a long awaited breath of ease and comfort

To no longer be numb from the devastation of turmoil

It there...

Holding out hope

With faith in action

Conviction and belief

And a heart open and full of understanding

There is decisions to be made

The compass within points true north

Strong and free

Its there...

Just like those of us who love and care

We stand in unity with you

A helping hand reaching out... always

When needed or called upon

For all the hours and moments

Day or night

Its there.

©2016

"Bargaining..."

His mind is a whirlwind beyond all thoughts, questions, or reasons

How vividly are life's horrors burned into his memories

His eyes are dark as eternal night

His skin is aflame with sorrow and crippling pain

He chews upon his lower lip until it bleeds

He has found his true self within the arms of another

But the forever watchful eyes of the world has him regretting his choice

He has sold his soul to the devil

He tries to laugh at his misfortune, but sounds fake

His eyes hurt and burn with sadness

He mentally disciplines his heart for yielding to such temptation

His raging emotions seep through the concrete walls that he has put up around his heart

His mind screams as the break of dawn only brings guilt as well as light

He slowly creeps away from the sleeping devil who has stolen his soul

He sits in a darkened corner away from the twilight

So desperately does he need to be rescued

He bargains with his sanity...

His whole life rests precariously upon the edge

He holds onto a phone book, scanning its pages

Help cannot be obtained within the names of those he loves

His trembling fingers trace column after bold letter column

Tears rain down, smearing the names

He blinks blindly at the numerous pages before him

Time stops while he searches in vain for his soul...

Published in: "Whispers In The Wind"
Anthology of verse
 Poetry Institute of Canada

© 2016

"With This Day"

It starts...

One little thing

The beginning...

A single seed planted

It grows...

Moments gather together

Thoughts play out

The hours of the day already grow long

Strength needed is sourced out and put into play

Building blocks of a wall are constructed

Eyes search for the exit

Scenario by scenario runs through the mind

All upon a continuous loop

Decisions and choices

Between what is right...

And what is easy

Doubt draws near like fog filling in thick

Confusion gives way to sadness

Anger is the by-product of everything left over

These are the moments when thoughts pause

Fight or flight...

You remind yourself that its just a bad few moments or hours

A bad day that needs to be done

It comes down to the ultimate choice

Though I do not surrender completely...

I am more than finished with this day

For it has taken from me...

More than I can give.

© 2016

"Words of Poison "

From your high horse of righteousness you preach

Causing stares

Pointed fingers

And words of murmured hate

Darkness spreads from underneath your every utterance

You claim to bring forth a cure

Yet you spread like a disease

You are not saving anyone

Only killing those who are brave enough to believe

Do not mistake privilege for superiority

We deserve to know our own happiness

This should not have to be compromised

Yet no apologies will ever be made

Because according to you...

This is what the truth feels like.

© 2016

"Last Place"

As I lay here in the dark

Eyes drifting towards the sky

Stars shine...

Darkness embraces me

Chilling my skin

Thoughts race

Lips quiver...

A strange blast of sound comes from my mouth...

As I scream out into the blackness

Horror made audible

Now echoes through the empty space around me

Sharpe words cause my heart to bleed

Tears flood my soul...

Because what you have done is more than hurt...

This is pain...

Anger....

Its devastation to the core...

And you put me here.

© 2016

"Yesterday Gone"

I bury my face deep within the palms of my hands

Filling them with tears...

Sometimes its not how or why things happened

The fact that they happened at all is bad enough...

Some memories are not simply just in our heads

Some you can remember so clearly

Because you can feel them physically ache within you with every waking breath...

Why is the reflection in the mirror-for some-never what they see?

And that its so easily forgotten that the courage and strength we need is already held within our hearts?

But when doubt and darkness take hold

Its a deep embrace not so quickly broken

Regret becomes the haunting ghost you cannot control

And existence can only be gained by living...

Making it the common understanding that you shouldn't have to kill yourself this much to live...

But as you cut the words, “I'm sorry” into your arm...

It spills out all the secrets of your life...

We who remain

Fall short on words, actions, or reasons...

And bare the hardest part

Anger...

Sadness...

Grief...

And forgiveness...

Leaving only tiny pieces of the larger things that use-to-be

And like all yesterdays gone

You where here with us...

Now, you are gone too.

© 2016

"My Last Confession..."

Your actions cause me to utter the cruelest words that I've ever spoken...

Angry is the heart that has had its love broken...

Tainted are the memories made

Turned away are the eyes that once looked so fondly

For your actions done

Have tattooed finger print stains upon my skin

I use to believe in you the way you did in me...

Caring..

Loving...

True...

Dark now is the light that once shone bright

Changed is everything

What came to be...

Is now use-to-be...

Memories to be soon forgotten

As I let these moments pass

Settling my racing heart

I catch my breath

Making this my last confession made

Above all else...

Let the truth of the matter be known...

From this day forward

And every moment after this

You will fail to inspire anything of any worth...

Anymore.

© 2016